Jane is 5 months old today! It's so crazy! It feels like just yesterday we were bringing her home with NO idea what we were doing!
Now she is learning how to sit up, eating solids, rolling around like crazy and sleeping through the night *hallejuah chorus* in her own crib!
I've been a mess all day today...somebody mentioned on one of her pictures I posted on Facebook that she looks so big...all of a sudden I'm sobbing because she's not my tiny little girl...she's actually growing up! I was looking through some pictures from a couple months ago and it's amazing how much bigger she's gotten in the past 5 months.
Today I'd also like to celebrate the fact that I am no longer living in intense fear of SIDS.
The first 3 months of Jane's life I was a wreck. I read way too many articles about it. I struggled daily with the fact that she co slept with us for 2 months (eventually I got over this after reading http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/sleep-problems/co-sleeping-yes-no-sometimes) , I beat myself up when I read that breastfeeding can help prevent and I wasn't breastfeeding! I made her sleep in diapers for weeks so she wouldn't over heat and then I read having a cold can up the chances, so I put her back in PJ's. I was bad. I would be up literally every half hour to check on her. If she fell asleep on my bed I'd strip it of all pillows and blankets and attempt to pull the sheet as tight as I could. I was barely functioning during the day and I was horribly crabby and almost half asleep sometimes! This became a huge problem when I went back to work. I decided sleeping with her was not going to work for us anymore. I moved her crib mattress into our room so she could sleep with us just not in bed....slowly but surely I stopped waking up all the time and then we moved her into her own room for real. The first night both of us slept through the night.
I still check on her while she takes naps and if I happen to wake up in the middle of the night I will peek in on her and watch her breathing but I sleep at night. She has a little blanket in the corner of her crib and she takes naps on out beds with out me spending half an hour stripping it!
Today I wrapped her up in one of my blankets and she took a nap like that...That was when I realized....I wasn't terrified anymore! :D